Today started out okay. But I was feeling spiteful. Shame on me. So I picked a fight with Michael. Shame on me. But I got some answers, and some peace. But mainly I am angry. He's not the man I married. I have to keep telling myself that. He has changed into this person I really don't like. Really. And according to him, this is who he wants to be and that this 'New Michael' can't stand to be around me. Nice.
*SIGH*
There are these things that I keep beating myself up about. Things that I really couldn't have changed anyway. Because, this wasn't my fault. So, I need to remember that when I feel as though he has ruined my life. He hasn't, my life has just started. When I feel abandoned and alone. I'm not, God loves me, my family loves me and I have amazing friends that love me. And because God loves me, he will put a man in my life that will truly love me. When I think that I can't be a single parent, I didn't ask to be a single parent, just remember that my kids will admire me for what I'm doing, one day. When I think that I'm worthless. (I think this one quiet often.) Remember all those people who loved me up there? Yeah, they still love me and I'm not worthless. And can I really achieve my dreams at 30? UHH, YES! I'm 30, not dead!
Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. 1 Peter 5:7
Thanks God, you're a pretty awesome dude, and the main reason why I know I can do this!
GOOD FOR YOU GIRL he deserves some low blows to say the least so if you want to pick a fight with him do it but just remember who angers you controls you so do not let him control you any longer dont give him the satisfaction of knowing that he is still on your mind and can still get under your skin your an amazing women and your right everyone makes it but you my friend are going to come out on top and thats what gonna make you one of the few special ones. More power to you grab the world by the balls and conquer that bi*ch
ReplyDeleteI have this passage on my fridge. Its been something I see everyday. Its helped me get through all my tough times.
ReplyDeleteThe LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.
Deuteronomy 31:8
I know you are strong. You can do this. A door may have been closed but God is opening MANY windows for you as He leads you down your new path. :)