He's taken away my whole life. My whole life. Everything I know and love. It know that sounds cliche, but it's the truth. I am standing here wondering where my life went, trying to figure out what the hell I did wrong. And he's running around at bars and fast food joints, just living his life. HELLO! When do I get a say-so in this situation? Why is it that he gets to say he's done, and turn around and walk away. I'm standing here picking up what is left of me. And there isn't much left at all. He's being unbelievably selfish. Not just to me. But to our kids. You know, when he got me pregnant, four times, he made a comment to those children to be their father! How can he just turn around and walk away? How can he not call everyday asking how they are? How can he just forget everything our family was? Why is this happening!!!!!!!!!!!! Make it stop, someone make it stop! I want to wake up from this horrible nightmare and realize my family is still intact. I keep reliving the night I found everything out, over and over. Make it stop. I need peace. Everyone keeps telling me I will be alright. How do they know? How do they know that I'm not gonna be alone forever? How do they know what I am feeling? How do they know how to function everyday with three children depending on me? How does anyone know?! Sometimes I want to punch her in the face. Well, most of the time I want to punch her in the face. But she's not the one that tore my family apart. It was him, he made the choice. Damn him! This is the hardest thing I have ever done in my entire life, including labor. Atleast with labor there is a beautiful reward at the end. Now, I see nothingness. I'm numb to the world around me. He just keeps living his life and i am scrambling to piece my back together. Someone please tell me how you know that I am going to be okay.